If Today Was a Fairytale
by DoubleKK
Summary: "Look at me! I'm like freaking Cinderella, and do you see a royal with a glass shoe around here?" Secret Santa gift for xXLittle AngelXx.


**If Today Was a Fairytale**

DoubleKK

**A/N: My Secret Santa gift to the lovely ****xXLittle AngelXx! I tried to incorporate a few elements from your wish list, although I don't know if you count Disney references as fantasy. Also, excuse the un-original song lyric title. But hopefully you enjoy it anyways. ^_^**

"_A princess! You just kissed yourself a princess."_

"_And I'm about to do it again."_

Ann clutched her knees tighter to her chest and let out a little squeak that could be considered a mini fan-girl squeal. Not that she would ever classify it as that, of course. With a fuzzy blanket wrapped around her shoulders and a nearly empty bowl of popcorn sitting next to her on the couch, the waitress was in full on comfort mode. And of course, it wouldn't be complete without a Disney movie playing on the TV. She let a giddy smile form on her face as the final song of the film was sung, and the shoved the last handful of popcorn in her mouth.

"Ann? Can you please help me in the dining room?" The door opened and Doug's head poked through, a pleading expression already set on his face. "Is your movie over?"

"No."

"It looks over."

"It's not."

"Well then can't you finish it later, I really need you to-"

"NO DAD. GET OUT."

Even her own father wouldn't dare to try and reason on the verge of an Ann-rage. Instead he let out a defeated sigh. "Fine. But when it is, can you please come do your job?"

The red-head turned to give Doug an indignant look. "You know, this could be considered child labour. Do you want me to contact the government, Dad? Is that what you want?" Ann threw herself over the side of the couch dramatically. "You are working your precious little daughter to the bone!"

Immune to his daughter's antics, Doug merely rolled his eyes. "You do realize that you are twenty three years old. Hardly a child." Ann was about to open her mouth to give a retort, but before she could, her father said, "I expect you in the dining room in ten minutes." He tone was more firm now, so Ann gave a non-committal shrug. Sighing again, her dad turned and left, shutting the door behind him.

_Victory! _

Less than a minute later, as the credits were rolling, Ann heard the door click open once more. Expecting her father returning to annoy her again, she turned irritably and started, "I told you, it's not over yet-" She stopped mid-snap when she saw the intruder was not Doug, but someone a lot blonder and in a far better mood.

"Oh my god! Why didn't you tell me you watching this movie?" Claire exclaimed, not waiting for an invitation and practically skipping over to the couch and plopping down next to the waitress. "Can we watch it again?"

"Hello there, Claire." Ann greeted her with a southern twang for no apparent reason. She was rather good friends with the farmer, who was petite and pretty and enjoyed showing up unannounced when she was bored. "And I wish I could, but my dad's gonna explode if I don't help him with work."

Claire wrinkled her nose, which only seemed to add more cuteness to her already adorable face. Sometimes Ann liked to pinch her cheeks like a creepy auntie just to piss her off. "That sucks. This is like, my favourite Disney movie of all time. I just love their animated stuff."

"I know, right? And Tiana is one of the best heroines ever. Next to Mulan, of course." Ann was highly passionate about her cartoon women. "She's so awesome. I think if I was a Disney character, I'd be Tiana." Of course, this statement wouldn't be complete without Ann deciding to prove this by screeching out one of her songs.

"_I'm almost there! People 'round here think I'm crazy, but I don't care!"_

Claire tried to hide her cringing with a smile. "Who do you think I'd be?" she mused.

Thankfully, the waitress stopped singing to consider this. "Ariel, I think." She concluded, studying her friend. "You remind me a lot of her, actually."

Claire seemed pleased with this response. "Really? I love Ariel. She was always one of my favourites." The blonde reclined onto the side of the couch and brought her knees up. "And I wouldn't mind for Prince Eric to come and sweep me off my feet."

Rolling her eyes, Ann picked up the remote and turned off the TV as the final castle logo appeared. "Oh, come on Claire. You must be careful not to expect fictional characters to exist in real life. 'Tis not healthy."

The farmer seemed unfazed. "Don't you ever wish for a Prince Charming, Ann?" For some reason she decided now to stretch out her legs, and in doing so disturbed the bowl of popcorn and it fell to the ground. Kernels rolled along the spotless hardwood floor. "Oops." Ann's eye twitched as she stared the new mess, contemplating whether to deal with it immediately. Her OCD won.

"No Claire, I don't, because Prince Charming is from a fairy tale and doesn't exist." She said as she got up to fetch a broom and dustpan to clean up the mess. When she returned from the other side of the room, Claire was frowning. "What? Don't you think it's unrealistic to think some rich guy will come and sweep you off your feet?" she spoke this rather sourly, sweeping up the kernels with rigor.

Claire looked confused, and had a right to be; Ann never talked like this. She never before commented on the realistic features of Disney movies; she only seemed to care about the happy ending and the music she could screech out. "Are you feeling okay?" asked the blonde timidly. "You're being weird. Sensible. Un Ann-like."

"I'm serious! Don't you think that it's giving little girls the wrong idea?" said Ann indignantly, tossing the kernels in the trash can. She threw her hands in the air dramatically, still holding the broom and dustpan. "Look at me! I'm like fucking Cinderella, and do you see a royal with a glass shoe around here?"

Claire shrugged. "I think its fine to dream. Just because you'll never have a prince doesn't mean you'll never have a _guy_." It was becoming clear that her friend wasn't just referring to her lack of a fairy godmother and pumpkin carriage.

Ann realized how she was sounding at the moment, and quickly recovered. "Psssh. What are you talking about? I don't need a guy. You may have your Cliff, but I, Ann, am awesome enough on my own."

That sounded more like something the waitress would say. "Hey, what about that movie where the normal girl becomes a princess?" said Claire thoughtfully. "The one with Anne Hathaway? That one is more realistic."

"The Princess Diaries?"

"Yeah! And in the second one she gets married to Chris Pine."

After washing her hands in the sink, Ann flopped back down on the couch and grabbed a pillow. "That's still just a movie, Claire. But now I want to watch the second one. Chris Pine is _gorgeous_."

The blonde pretended to swoon. "Actually, I think I'd take him over Eric. God, he's hot."

"Oh my god, like, I know right?" A lisping male voice could be heard from the doorway. The girls looked over. Standing at the threshold was a tall, broad shouldered brunette guy with a smirk on his face. He was wearing jeans and a plaid shirt with a ball cap. Neither of them had heard him come in. "Back off ladies, he's mine.

"Very funny, Jack." said Claire, eyes rolling.

"I thought so." replied Jack, fully walking in to the room now. It was actually more of a saunter. "Besides talking about how attractive I am, what are you doing?"

Jack was Claire's older brother. He also worked on the farm, but lacked the bubbly personality of his sister. On the contrary, his ego was quite large and he was as annoying as he was charming. Though Ann would hate to admit it, he was an overall good guy. And the fact that he was quite handsome didn't hurt. "Get out of here, Jack." Ann snapped, though rather half-heartedly.

Taking her annoyance as an invitation, Jack walked over and threw himself over the back of the couch, his head somehow ending up in Ann's lap. She pushed him off immediately, and he righted himself, grinning and wiggling around to make room between his sister and the waitress. "Aren't you supposed to be shearing the sheep?" asked Claire dryly.

"Nope, I finished." He replied smugly, putting his feet up on the coffee table in front of them. Ann glared at his dirty work boots, now making a muddy spot on the formerly clean surface. "The Princess and the Frog?" he said, noticing the DVD case near his feet.

Ann didn't like the tone he used when he said that. "Shut up." she said, eyes narrowing. "Don't think I won't hurt you."

This only seemed to amuse Jack. "_You're_ going to hurt_ me_?" he said mockingly, turning to face her directly.

"Yeah, I am."

"Guys, quit it." said Claire tiredly. Jack teasing Ann like this was a normal occurrence, but it was best to stop it before it resulted in an Ann-rage. She put her hand on her brother's shoulder and attempted to remove him from the couch, but he wouldn't budge.

"No, I'd like to see this." Jack said, looking at Ann challengingly. "Go ahead, sweetheart. Show me what you got."

The use of a condescending pet name only succeeded in pissing off Ann further. She stared back at him, raising her eyebrows as well as her hand. "I don't really want to have to do this, but...HIYAH!"

Both siblings had been expecting maybe a slap to the face, or something equally normal. What they were not expecting was for Ann for bring down her hand in a swift karate chop to Jack's knee. "Ouch!" His leg shot out like a rocket as if she had hit the reflex nerve, his foot slamming into the bottom of the coffee table. Ann's smirk was wide as she watched Jack clutch the offended area, gritting his teeth. She knew that it hurt a lot more than he was letting on. "How does that feel, Jack?"

He seemed to have no comeback, or maybe it was that he couldn't speak through the pain. Claire was trying not to laugh, but failing miserably. "Okay," Jack said after a moment. "I'll give you a little credit for that."

"That'll teach you not to insult my Princess and the Frog." said Ann triumphantly. "You don't want to face the wrath of ninja-Ann."

"Shit!" exclaimed Claire, out of nowhere. The other two looked over, Jack still holding his knee. The blonde was looking at her watch, frowning. "I was supposed to meet Cliff downstairs a while ago." She explained in response to their confused expressions.

Realizing that Claire had only come to visit her while she was waiting for her boyfriend, Ann tried to hide her annoyance. "Well, go on then." She said, motioning to the door. "Don't want to keep him waiting."

Claire rose from the couch uncertainly. "Are you mad?"

"Of course not." _Of course I am._

"Okay. Well, I'll talk to you later, okay?" she said, smiling apologetically and walking towards the door. "Come on, Jack."

Jack turned around to look at his sister. "Why do I have to come with you to see Cliffy?" he whined. "I want to stay here."

Sighing like a mom dealing with a slow child, Claire replied, "I don't want you to come with me, I want you to stop bothering Ann."

"I second that." said Ann, bringing her feet up to try and push him off the couch. In this she was unsuccessful, for he was a lot heavier than her. "Stop it Ann, stop it!" he whined mockingly.

"Jack, let's go." said Claire more sternly now.

"Just go, Claire." said Ann, her feet still on her brothers neck. "You don't want to be any later. I can deal with him myself."

"Alright. See you guys later. Jack, _behave_." With this final warning, she left the room.

After watching his sister leave, Jack turned back to the waitress, his signature smirk returning to his face. "So. What's new?"

"Get out."

"How's life?"

"I mean it, Jack."

"Excited for the holidays?"

"Were you dropped on your head as a child?"

It was as if Jack was completely deaf when it came to anything she was saying. He leaned back on the arm of the couch, bringing his feet up to her lap. Ann, like she had done previously with his head, shoved them off. "So, the Princess and the Frog, huh?" returning her glare with a smile. "In to the fairy tale stuff? Waiting for your Prince Charming and all that bullshit?"

Finding it ironic that she had had nearly this same conversation with his sister not more than ten minutes before, Ann found it infinitely more annoying when it was Jack mentioning it. "Disney has painted men to be a lot better than the actual inferior pigs that they are." She snapped. Jack's eyebrows rose at her viscous tone. "And I don't need nor want a man."

"Well, it doesn't seem like you could get one, anyway." He responded quietly, but not nearly softly enough that she couldn't hear.

Ann's fury skyrocketed at this comment, almost not believing that he would say something like that. "What's that supposed to mean?" she growled dangerously. This one rude comment was resulting in what was probably the angriest she'd ever been at Jack. He seemed to sense this, but didn't let up at all.

"Well, you haven't ever had a real relationship, have you?" he said, so casually that she was considering hitting him again. "Unless you count that tiny thing with Cliff a few years ago. Which I don't."

"And I suppose you've had millions of girlfriends, right?" she said coldly. Through her anger, Ann was realising that he was right; she had never had a real boyfriend before. It wasn't really a secret. In a town with an amount of guys her age she could count on one hand, there weren't too many choices. And her dad setting up her and Cliff on a date when he first came to the island really_ didn't_ count. "Oooh, Mr. Jack Evans, such a lady killer."

He didn't even have to the dignity to look embarrassed. "Contrary to popular belief, I have not had _millions_."

"Well, I feel sorry for all the girls you dated. They obviously didn't realize what a prick you are until they dumped you."

"How many boys have you kissed, Ann?"

Managing to completely catch her off guard again, she had no comeback to this, other than "That's none of your business." Ann could feel herself flushing from anger as well as embarrassment, and found herself actually thinking about the answer to his question. _Rick, when I was five. It was "icky." Only happened because Karen made us. Gray, thirteen, really awkward. In a game of truth or dare, dared by Karen. Cliff, two years ago, an unbelievably awkward mistletoe kiss. It was hung there suspiciously by...Karen._

Every single kiss Ann had ever had in her life had been because of Karen.

_Well that's kind of...depressing._

"Why don't you show me what you've got then, sweetheart?" Jack's voice snapped her back to reality; she realized with a jolt that he was a lot closer to her now, attempting to invade her personal space. She pushed him away, horrified. "What is your _problem_?" she yelled. Ann couldn't believe how much this stupid guy was getting under her skin.

"Oh, I get it." Jack said, moving back over to his side of the couch. "You're waiting for a _Prince_, right?"

That was what did it. Feeling adrenaline rushing through her veins, Ann rose from her seat to stand before the farmer. "You need to leave." She grabbed his arms and pulled, yanking him from the couch and shoving him towards the door. Jack stumbled, surprised at the ease with which she removed him. This was one of the side effects of an Ann-rage; random development of super-strength.

"Have I offended you?" Jack said, still mockingly. Ann merely continued to push him towards the door. "Aw, come on I was just joking."

When she successfully had him out of the room and in to the hall, she stood at the threshold to give him one last glare. Of course, all he did was smirk at her, and began to sing in a high voice, "_Soooomedaaaay_ _my prince will come_-"

And with that, she slammed the door in his face.

_

* * *

_

_Stupid dad, making me climb out on a stupid ladder to put up the stupid Christmas lights..._

Ann was not happy. She made this highly clear to her father when he asked her to put up lights on the front of the Inn. Jack really had her rattled from the previous day, and after he left, she had to deal with a very drunken Duke. But her father had zero sympathy, telling her his back was bothering him and he had no one else to ask. "What if I was depressed, Dad? What if I was so deprived of your love because all you ever make me do is chores and this was the last straw and because you're making me do this I'm going to throw myself off the ladder and commit suicide and it'll be all your fault!"

Ann had thought it had been a wonderful excuse. And yet here she was, holding a bundle of lights and trying to set a ladder against the side of the building. When she had asked the Inn's boys to help her, neither of them seemed to care that she was being forced into this labour. Gray had mumbled something about work , and Cliff made up some bullshit excuse about having to talk to Carter at the church.

_No one cares about Ann, nope. _the redhead thought bitterly, starting to climb the ladder with the lights under one arm, hammer in her hand and nails in her pocket. _Merry Christmas Ann, go do this in the freezing cold while I go to the stupid Supermarket._

She reached the end of the ladder, which was positioned at the very top corner of front of the building. Due to its tavern style ceiling of the front room , the two story Inn was a lot taller than normal; she was nearly fifteen feet in the air. Ann looked down, feeling slightly uneasy at the height. "You can do this." she said aloud. "You are the amazingly awesome Ann."

She reached up and used her tools to successfully secure the first end of the string. Smiling at the surprising ease of the task, she stretched out the lights and repeated it. "Ha! This is easy." She exclaimed, feeling remarkably proud of herself. Unsurprisingly, Ann decided then would be a good time for a Christmas carol. "_Sleigh bells ring, are you listening? In the laaaane, snow is glistening_!"

Not caring that she was probably annoying the neighbours, Ann sang loud and off-key, increasing her morale to complete the chore. _Nothing a little Christmas spirit can't fix! _When it got to the point where it looked like she was going to need to move the ladder, the waitress was so busy with her singing that she didn't realize how far off the side she was stretching. "_In the meadow we can build a snowman, and pretend that he is_-AAAAAH!"

The next thing Ann knew, the ladder had disappeared from beneath her. That horrid moment of dread, like when you slip on stairs, jolted in her stomach. Luckily, as the ladder crashed to the ground, she managed to grab the windowsill nearest to spare a broken neck. That was where she dangled, too much open space between her feet and the ground with no way down. The first thought that came to Ann's mind was, _Fan-fucking-tastic. This is all Dad's fault._

Ann tried not to panic, but it was quite difficult when hanging off the side of a building. The ice on the windowsill was not making it any easier. "It's okay. You'll be fine." She told herself, not completely believing it. The red-head craned her neck trying to see if there was anyone nearby on the street for assistance. There wasn't.

"GOD DAMNIT!"

Ann let out a few more choice swear words before calming herself down. _I'm gonna have to go either up or down. _Considering there was no possible way she could reach the ground from here without breaking bones, up seemed like the only option. Taking a deep breath, she planted her feet against the side of the house, and using a combination of upper body strength and leverage, slowly manoeuvred her way onto the window sill. When she was safe, Ann let out a huge sigh of relief and silently thanked her mother, who was the one who had the windowsills come out so far so she could have potted plants during the warm months.

_Mom..._

She turned her attention back to the window pane. It was difficult to position herself so she was facing it, but somehow she managed. Ann grabbed onto the screen to remove it and peered in to the room.

Her heart sank.

The window she was at was the one of the room Kai stayed in during the summer; the one with the broken latch that would never open. She knew this because Kai would whine about it all the time, and had to keep an extra fan in his room so it wouldn't get too hot. Nearly everyone who had ever been in the Inn had tried to open that window before, and none had ever succeeded; even Mr. Biceps Gray couldn't make it budge. _Today is just not my day._

"Need a hand?"

The voice of the speaker was familiar, but not in a good way, because Ann knew it belonged to the very last person she wanted to see at that moment. She didn't even have to look at him to get annoyed immediately. "I'm fine, thanks."

"Are you sure?" the voice called back doubtfully.

The waitress risked her stable position just so she could turn to glare. Jack was standing in the snow-dusted yard of the Inn, looking up at her with amusement, but also genuine concern. He was bundled up in a navy winter jacket, for it was below zero, and his signature ball cap was missing. "I don't need help from _you_." Ann said coldly, continuing to give the farmer a death glare.

"Well," said Jack, seeming unfazed at her icy tone. "From what I could see walking down the street, you can't get in that window." He observed the distance between the redhead and the ground. "And jumping would be very unwise."

"My dad's home." Ann lied, hoping it would make him go away. "He's coming to help me in a sec."

"Really. Because I just saw him at the Supermarket, and it looked like he was gonna be a while."

_Damnit._

Annoyed that he had managed to call her bluff, Ann tried to look unaffected. "I'm sure you have things to do. I'll just wait till he gets back. _Go away, go away, GO AWAY. _She still had far from forgiven him for the things he said the day before, and didn't want to admit that at that moment, she really_ could_ use his assistance.

"It's probably gonna snow soon." Jack said, moving his eyes upwards to the sky, which was cloudy. He seemed to be enjoying the waitress' unwillingness to accept his help. "You sure you wanna wait that long?"

"Fine!" snapped Ann, giving in. She really didn't want to be stuck out on a windowsill in the freezing cold, waiting for her Dad to finish shopping, which could take a ridiculously long time. He was stocking up for Christmas dinner. "Just get the stupid ladder so I can climb down!"

His look turned almost apologetic. "No can do, sweetheart. Looks like it broke when you knocked it over."

Enraged, Ann manoeuvred herself so she was sitting outwards, legs dangling off the edge of the windowsill like she was on a ferris wheel. She looked over to the fallen ladder. It was indeed broken; the part that bends when closed was snapped in the middle on one of the sides. "Well, this is just great." she said sarcastically. "Aren't ladders supposed to be durable? This is bullshit. I'm phoning the company that made it when I get down from here."

"So how are you planning on doing that?"

She glared at Jack once more. "Go get me another ladder."

"I don't have one."

"How can you not have a ladder?"

"Why _would_ I?"

"I don't know, you're a farmer! Wouldn't you need it to paint your barn red or something?"

"My _barn_ is _brown_." Jack replied, pretending to be offended. Ann just made an irritated noise. He was proving to be no help whatsoever. She was starting to feel quite cold, regretting her decision to only throw on a thick hoodie instead of her normal winter coat.

"You know," Jack said, observing the distance between her and the lawn again. "If you jumped, I could probably catch you."

Ann snorted, assuming he was joking. "I don't think so, bud. Now go ask Barley or someone if they have a ladder."

"Ann, you and your dad are the only people in town who own a ladder tall enough to reach you, and it's broken." Jack replied, all of the humour gone from his tone and stating it like a fact. "Now, I know about that window, and I may not be strong enough to open it, but I'm definitely strong enough to catch you." He almost managed to say that without sounding too cocky, but in Ann's opinion, not quite.

The waitress was starting to dislike how sensible he was being, and what the outcome of that would be. "You really think I should jump." She said dryly.

"I don't see any other alternative."

Neither did Ann. "Okay," she snapped, hating that he was right. "But you can't let me fall. If you drop me and I die, I'm haunting you for the rest of your life. And you _really_ don't want that." The look on her face told Jack that she meant it.

He nodded encouragingly, not liking the prospect of an angry Ann-ghost. "I promise."

Not believing what she was doing, Ann sighed dramatically and slowly slid off the windowsill until she was hanging off by her hands once more. "Are you down there?" she yelled, unable to see if the farmer had positioned himself under her. A quick "Yep!" told her that he had.

"Just so you know, if I hurt you, I'm not apologizing."

Jack laughed. Ann wasn't sure why, because she had been dead serious. "Okay. Now, just let go and I'll catch you."

"Now?"

"Yes."

"...now?"

"Yes, Ann."

Ann swallowed, trying not to think about how high in the air she was and what would happen if Jack failed to catch her._ It's going to be okay._ She reassured herself for the umpteenth time. Taking a deep breath, she slowly let her fingers slip from her former perch.

And then she was falling.

It took everything Ann had not to scream. The feeling of free falling made it seem like her stomach was ready to jump out her throat. But it ended a lot quicker than it started, and before she knew it a pair of strong arms had encircled the waist of the red-head. She felt her feet hit the ground with little impact. Ann was safe on the ground once more.

"You alright?" Jack's voice came from somewhere behind her head. She could feel that hischin was touching her hair. She pulled away from his arms quickly and turned around. "I'm fine." Ann said briskly. Looking at the farmer, she realized what he had just done for her and felt a little bit of guilt stirring in her gut.

"Um...thanks, Jack."

He smiled. Not mocking grin, or a smirk, but a real, charming smile. The smile that had probably made many girls swoon before her. It even made Ann blush the tiniest bit, to her dismay. _Stop it! What is wrong with you? _"I'm always happy to help a damsel in distress."

Jack had spoken it innocently enough, and it didn't sound like he was saying it to piss her off, but for some reason it did. It seemed like everything that man said had the ability to annoy her. Ann felt the same anger from the day sparking once more. "Why do you _do_ that?" she snapped.

He seemed taken aback. "Do what?"

"Act like I'm supposed to fall head over heels for you because you're the guy, and I'm just some stupid girl who can't think for herself?" Ann said with venom, looking him right in his brown eyes. She was standing a lot closer to him than necessary, only because she hadn't back away enough after he caught her. "And because I like Disney movies, you treat me like an ever _stupider_ girl who is only waiting for some _prince_." She spat out the last word like it tasted bad in her mouth.

"I'm not even trying to-"

"And you're so conceited!" she yelled, not even giving him time to defend himself. "That shit you pulled yesterday, making me feel bad and then asking me to...to kiss you!" Ann found herself getting embarrassed even thinking about the incident. But she was too angry at that moment to acknowledge it. "It's like you have some sort of superiority complex or something, with your sexist attitudes and stupid _smirk_."

"Ann, just calm down for a second-"

As usual, being told to calm down only succeeded in adding fuel to the fire that was the Ann-rage. "Shut up Jack! I don't care that you just saved me, get out of here." She put her hands on his chest and pushed as hard as she could. The fury-induced strength had returned, and Jack took a step back to try and stabilize himself. She didn't shove him as far this time, only further out on to the lawn. "I hate you!"

With that statement, Ann stopped pushing and stormed over the broken ladder, fuming. She examined the damage, trying to calm down. _You can't let him get under your skin like this._ "Dad's going to kill me." She muttered. She didn't want to turn around, for she knew Jack hadn't left yet. She stayed that way until she heard the crunch of boots against snow. But they were not going in the direction she was hoping for.

"No, you don't."

His voice was directly in her ear, and the waitress tried not to jump. She spun around, infuriated at the audacity of his statement. "What? Yes, yes I do!"

"You couldn't hate me." Jack said smugly. Ann couldn't believe after she had cut him up that much just seconds before, and he was still acting as cocky as ever. "If you hated me, you wouldn't have let me help you. You would have waited for your Dad or someone else. And," he paused, taking in the dangerous look on her face. "You're still here talking to me."

_Unbelievable._

"You know, Ann, you should really just accept the fact that you actually_ like_ me. And maybe I wouldn't tease you so much if you didn't lose your temper so easily. I just find it quite amusing, these so called 'Ann-rages.' You know, you really should-"

_Smack!_

Ann never did get to find out what she should do, because Jack's sentence was cut off by her hand connecting to his face. It was a good-old-fashioned slap, making a lovely echo as it hit his cheek. She figured it probably didn't hurt as much as the ninja-Ann karate chop , but achieved the desired effect. For his expression was stunned as he turned back to face her, cheek embedded with a flaming red handprint and ready to say something; but again he was cut off. This time by the waitress' mouth on is.

The kiss was nearly as ferocious as the slap; Ann had grabbed both sides of his face and her fingers knotted in his hair. She felt something stirring, deep in her stomach, as his lips pressed against Jack's. She didn't give him very much time to react though, pulling away after only a few seconds. The red-head stood back, staring at his even more confused face. She hoped he could still feel the sting of the slap mixed with the feeling of her kiss.

_Because that's how I feel about you._

For once, it seemed the farmer was speechless. She enjoyed him looking stupid, with his face still bearing the handprint. He seemed to be red from more than just her attack now. After a few seconds of floundering, Jack managed to say, "Why...why did you do that?"

Assuming the slap was self explanatory and he was referring to the kiss, she replied, "Because I needed to do it before you did."

"I don't get it..." It seemed that all of Jack's usual snarky confidence had disappeared; now that it was Ann taking charge, it was clear he was more of an all-talk-no-action guy. Ann stood before him, her hip cocked to one side, enjoying his new found awkwardness way too much.

"Well, it seems I'm ridiculously attracted to you. And you pay too much attention to me not to be attracted to me." Ann couldn't even believe she was saying this out loud, in such a casual, matter-of-the-fact way. "But you really piss me off. So you can run along, _sweetheart_."

Ann decided then would be a great time to walk back inside, leaving the still confused farmer out in the snow. She would deal with the Christmas lights and the ladder later. Smiling to herself, she thought of a quote she once heard from Ellen Page.

_Why would you be Sleeping Beauty when you can be Aladdin?_

**A/N: SO YEAH. The ending may feel kind of rushed (because the whole thing is kind of rushed) and I feel like I sorta painted Ann's and Jack's relationship kind of strange... but I hope my beautiful recipient still liked it. X) I apologize for my extensive Princess and the Frog references; I'm just kinda obsessed with that movie right now. I wish everyone a Merry Christmas!**


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